Lost in Lust

Hey hey hey!

(May I be more consistent with sharing my day to day faith walk with you all in Jesus name, Amen!)

Can I just begin by giving a shout out to God! He’s so amazing that it’s impossible to quantify Him. Just yesterday, I had made some mistakes and silently told myself I was done. Haha. I was done with this faith walk, why do I have to keep falling? Why can’t I just be a consistent christian who makes God happy all the time?

I threw myself a pity party and focused on my works as what can make God love me; or what can make me FEEL more loved by God. He didn’t love me less but I was oh so tired of myself. I can’t count how many times I said I wasn’t going to do something again and went ahead to do it; or the times I said I will do something and never did. (Even with this blog).

But His love always waits for me when I think I can’t take anymore. Like this morning, I woke up with the tangible presence of his love all around and in me. It was almost like a blanket and ‘Incredible Love’ by Nathaniel Bassey immediately came to mind. I remained on my bed and used my earpiece to listen to the song, but I knew I wanted to do more. For weeks, I had reflected on the times I used to dance and sing during my quiet time.

I really missed those times of childlikeness in God’s presence, but always felt too shy to sing and dance now because I shared a space with my sister. Earlier this week, I even promised to sing all day to God (it’s just part of our relationship), but I only remembered my promise after work and had to apologize.

Anyway, today, I finally got up and danced and danced and danced. I can’t describe the feeling but it was beautiful. I felt like He was sitting on a large chair in front of me and smiling proudly as I moved in honour of Him. I joined the host of heaven to do what they do every minute…giving glory in word and action.

You’re probably wondering how this relates with lust. Just read on.

I always complain of how I don’t spend time with God at night anymore, but I was being a hypocrite because I always blamed it on lack of time. Meanwhile, I spent time on Social Media every night before sleeping. I normally put off my data before I sleep EVERY NIGHT, but knew I had to up my game. So now, I put off data right before I get home (no matter the hot gist) so I can spend some minutes reading my Bible.

Few days ago, I spent my final hours before bed on social media, following a recent hot gist about a celebrity. I don’t even follow him but because I was hearing some sad news recently related to him, I binged on his handle. And then I slept and had the most demonic lustful dream I’ve ever had in my life!

I woke and immediately felt irritated with myself and mad that I had let my guard down (by not reading the word and praying consistently). I was also mad at the devil because he knows just when we give him a small crack in our spiritual lives and he comes in through those cracks without invitation.

I researched lustful dreams before leaving home and found that such dreams make one suddenly lustful in the physical and that’s one thing I mentioned here that I was battling with. The devil is a liar sha.

That’s when I became more strict about what I let in, especially right before I close my eyes to sleep.

Just yesterday, I read my bible, wrote in my journal and meditated on the word before bed. God taught me a new lesson about fruit in John 15 and related it with fruit in Galatians 5. That was what I thought about right before bed.

Guess what?

Even as I slept, that word was still alive. I was still in meditation mood even while sleeping. Can’t even describe it. And then I woke and had the most amazing quiet time I have had in a while.

I was lost in lust because I was taking in less of the word and more of the world; right before bed.

Whether you like it or not, what you see, hear or meditate on right before bed can influence your entire night.

I just thank God for Jesus who is able to always save me from the devil and from myself. Even when I use my own hand to open small cracks for nonsense, He shows me the danger and helps me shut the doors that need to be shut.

Lust is real, many Christians are battling it but don’t know what to do or have who to talk to. It’s almost like a crime to even talk about it, but here’s what has worked for me.

The secret place (Psalm 91) is my secret to overcoming lust. Now, when nonsense thoughts come to mind, I speak loudly against them and don’t entertain them.

And for lust in sleep, try what I just shared. Genuinely read the word, pray and meditate on new lessons from God right before bed. It will influence your mornings.

The way they say the future is made now is the same way mornings are made at night.

See Jesus right before bed, He’ll be the one you will see when you wake as well.

 

 

I hope this was helpful to you in one way or the other.

Have you ever had lustful dreams or thoughts?

How did you deal with it?

Please, share in the comment section, you never know who will learn from you.

 

Love and light,

Mobolaji.

 

 

 

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5 thoughts on “Lost in Lust

  1. This was absolutely helpful to me. I agree my nights are social media like. Then I wake some days inspired and most days uninspired. I will start seeking Jesus before bed. Thank you.

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